Flushing Family Values

Wes and I went down to Florida this weekend for my grandparents’ fiftieth anniversary. It’s quite a drive for a total of 43 hours spent there, but we were happy to do it. Fifty years together is such an achievement. I hope we can make it that long. Right now I feel like that’s a definite, but there are also those times when I believe I might end up being the subject of Snapped on the Oxygen channel.

My mom has been trying to put together something to celebrate this occasion for nine to ten months now. It’s been a huge process with us coming up with an idea, then either my sister or I trying to run it by Mammaw, only to come to the same conclusion that we probably won’t be able to satisfy Mammaw because she won’t come right out and tell us what she wants. Finally, about three weeks ago after I talked to Mammaw and sort of started the fire, my Uncle decided to get proactive in the planning process too. My Mom and him hashed out some plans for a surprise party.

So with invitations sent immediately and many phone calls later, Saturday we met at a restaurant with about thirty-five to forty of Mammaw and Pawpaw’s closest friends to congratulate them on the love they share. It turned out great. We made Christmas ornaments with their wedding photo for party favors, Mom and Whitney decorated the restaurant and got the cakes together, I got the presents ready, Melanie put together a photo book, and the rest of the family….well…

It was eye opening to look around at all the older couples still together. One couple in particular is about to celebrate their sixtieth anniversary and still look so much in love. Some guests were bitter sweet, husbands have passed but the widows still had their girlfriends to ride, sit, and gossip with them. Still, no matter the circumstances or the relationship status, all were there with smiles to celebrate this amazing milestone in Mammaw and Pawpaw’s life and you couldn’t help but feel the love.

Being back home with my parents and grandparents is always something I look forward to. I just wish I had more time to spend with them. Our side of the family has always been close. When Whitney and I lived at home, and even during college home visits, we met every Friday with our parents and grandparents for Friday night dinners to catch up on the week. It was a way less stuffy version of the Gilmore Girls with a little less judgment and way more gossiping. It was nice to always count on Mammaw and Pawpaw to be there to support us in anything.

Perhaps this is why now family gatherings still mean so much to me and, also, why I get so pissed at others for not appreciating them. I know that everyone is different no matter if they’re raised the same or not. Prime examples are the differences between me and my sister, or Wes and Matt. Still, I have shown up (not because I get presents for Christmas or for my Birthday, or because I get a free meal and open bar out of it) to everything, with pneumonia, after sports injuries, after oral surgery, etc. because I love the company. Whitney flew in from Italy and we drove down from Nashville and still some people can’t make a phone call. Nothing is more upsetting, especially since it was also my Pawpaw’s birthday. I know it’s not my business what others do and I also know I’ll never be able to change the circumstances but when did family values go down the toilette? Perhaps it’s my immaturity that makes me consistently want to put others before myself and show respect to the people who have been there and who will always be there no matter the amount of respect you may show them.

I look forward to the day when Wes and I are ready for children because I will proud to have them around Mammaw (who has the hugest heart and greatest sense of humor) and Pawpaw (a man of few words but who’s wisdom and knowledge surpass all). I know we have become better people because of these two and they are truly an inspiration to all, because their love never ends…no matter what! Hopefully, one-day people will gather to celebrate and have the same amazing things to say about me. Until then…

If it’s all gonna happen sometime, then why not now?

The Joker Reincarnated

“All of these lines across my face

Tell you the story of who I am

So many stories of where I’ve been

And how I got to where I am”

In 2005 Brandi Carlile released her single ‘The Story’ and the first thing I thought when I finally listened and understood the lyrics was…Isn’t she a little young to have ‘All of these lines across her face’. At the date of the release she was exactly the same age as I am now. I never truly understood why she would age herself but then yesterday I gave myself a makeshift facial and it all became clear.

Basically, once or twice a month I do a deep pore cleanse, followed by blackhead removing Biore strips, and then one or two different masks. Yesterday, I followed the same routine. I have this Swiss mask that’s a deep cleaning clay mask which is suppose to firm and tighten, improving skin’s elasticity for smooth, radiant skin. Wes always tells me I smell like mud, or laughs at me when I have it on because it’s this bright shade of blue and when it dries it lightens and hardens. All is usually normal, 20 minutes later I wash and my skin feels smooth. But then there was yesterday…

Maybe it was because I was feeling a little down (refer to first blog) or because I haven’t noticed it before, but when it came time to wash this mask off…there they were. All these lines I’ve never noticed before. I looked like Heath Ledger as the joker. I’ve never been a smoker, sure there were the times in college when I was hammered and bummed a cigarette or in high school when I thought I was cool and stole them from my dad but not enough to cause ALL of what I saw in the mirror. I went out immediately and bought lots of wrinkle cream. I’ll be damned if I’m going to look like I have a full time pleated mustache when I grow up.

I’ve always said that I wish I’d have taken a naked picture of myself when I was in high school during my prime. Not anything like retards today are doing. I wouldn’t give it to a silly boy or sext it to the rest of the class. I just want it to hold on to so that if I were feeling down I could look at it and think…you were hot once and you can totally be that way again. It would even prove helpful with Wes when he had done something to piss me off and I could show it to him and say ‘I looked like this once, you should feel lucky to have me. What if I get that way again and someone else gets to enjoy it?’. It would totally be the best motivation.

My mom has always said that one of her skinniest times of her life was after she had my sister and I. I guess that’s one thing about having children that I get to look forward to. You better believe if that’s the case I’m going to go out and get a mold of my body or like a painting done where no one really knows it’s me. It has to be really artistic looking, nothing gaudy, so that I can hang it somewhere in my home and when people see it, they’ll appreciate it as the art it is. Then one day someone will be like, I wish I looked like that and I could think…yeah you do and really know it’s me but they won’t, or maybe they will. I guess it depends on if they read my blog or not. Until later I guess…

If it’s all gonna happen sometime, then why not now?

When Did This Happen?

Is it possible to go through a mid-life crisis at 26? I can drive, vote, join the army, drink and legally drive a rental car...what else is there to look forward to birthday wise? Becoming over the hill? Yes, I have a great husband who more often than I'd like puts me 2nd, 3rd, 4th to his job, mom, etc.; and yes, we both have an amazing home which I've poured my heart into remodeling over the past 3 years; and yes, I get to laugh everyday at two of the most hilarious pups who are way more human like than any children I've met recently, none the less, I am straddling the line between newly wed and baby making; My ideas for our home are never ending even though our money isn’t; and I think I’m borderline crazy because I swear my dogs are now starting to talk back to me.

I’ve decided to blog, mainly because I’m so bored since I’m in a dead end job that only ‘needs’ me three days a week half the month and 4-5 the other half. Pretty much they expect me to manage the day-to-day aspects of the inventory, new merchandise, advertisements, and promotional aspects of the business on a part-time basis. There’s no upward movement or raise opportunity to look forward to, yet I stay because I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished in the two+ years of being there, even if my owner can’t appreciate it. Plus, I dream of one day owning my own store and this is the best way of learning what NOT to do. Still, there’s hope for me still, I’ve begun studying for my GMAT in my latest idea of returning to school. If I have to be an honors college graduate stuck in a part-time job, I might as well be an honors college graduate working towards a master. I think the biggest issue when it comes to my job is the embarrassment I get when someone asks me ‘What do you do’. I mean seriously...I WENT TO COLLEGE FOR THIS! Man did I pick the dumbest major the first time around. Hopefully, this time I can change that. I have to give my parents credit; they definitely support me in everything I decide to do. I doubt I would have listened to them if they objected to my B.S. in Apparel Merchandising, Design, and Production anyway. I’m hard headed like that.

Background information is always helpful, but hopefully I’ll get more entertaining as I become more familiar in the whole blogging thing. I’ll try to stay current the best I can. I suppose this is all for now. Until later I guess…

If it’s all gonna happen sometime, then why not now?